Teach Toddlers to Poop in the Toilet | Dealing with poop refusal & helping your child release poop
So maybe pee training your child was really easy, but poop training is a little bit more difficult. Well, I’m here to tell you that it’s actually really normal for kids to have a harder time learning how to poop in the potty than it is to pee. And obviously, I’m going to tell you how to handle it. So let’s go!
Teach Toddlers to Poop in the Toilet | Dealing with poop refusal & helping your child release poop
It kind of goes without saying that it takes more effort to poop than pee. It feels like something solid coming out of your body because it is, whereas pee is a lot more natural, you don’t really have to put in much effort and it’s just a lot easier. Kids can naturally be more scared of pooping in the potty. The problem is if kids are anxious or nervous about pooping and they start to hold it, then they’re going to become constipated. If they become constipated when they do poop it’s gonna hurt and it’s going to be harder for them to get their poop out and thus starts the cycle of constipation. It can affect their school performance, it can affect their sleep, it can affect their behavior, everything.
The best thing that you can do is start early introducing your child to poop going in the toilet, that doesn’t mean that your child needs to be sitting on the toilet to poop, but what you can do is when you’re changing their diaper, you can bring their poop, because it’s going to be solid at this point, bring the diaper to the bathroom with your child and dump it in the toilet and have your child flush it down. Tell your child poop goes in the potty and wave bye to your poopy, it’s going down the drain, and just let them know that this is normal poop is going in the potty.
I know some of you are gonna squirm about this one and stop and say I am not doing that, but let your kids watch you poop the more you model the behavior in everything that you do. The more you model these behaviors to your child, the more that they’re going to understand that they can do this too.
Now, if you have a child who is particularly concerned about pooping in the toilet, don’t push it, it’s not worth it.
If your child is wearing underwear during the day and all of their pee goes in the toilet, but they’re asking for a diaper or a pull up to poop in, let them have it. But you need to say “I will give you a diaper or pull up to poop in but you have to poop in the bathroom,” so even if they’re just standing or squatting in the bathroom, they need to be in the bathroom with the pull up on, and poop in the pull up. After they poop in the pull up, what you want to do is take the pull up off, dump the poop in the toilet, and have your child sit on the toilet, you want to then wipe them and clean them up as if they pooped in the toilet in the first place. This is going to get them accustomed to sitting and being wiped on the toilet.
Especially for boys, who may be peeing standing up, you want to make sure that you’re having them sit. If you can get them to sit for a couple of minutes, awesome! The more comfortable they get on the toilet, the more they’re going to let their poop come out one of these days.
Two or three weeks after having your child stand in the bathroom with the diaper on to poop and then dumping it in the toilet, what you’ll want to do is move your child from standing or squatting in the bathroom to sitting on the toilet with the diaper on while they poop, this is going to get them in that pooping position on the toilet, whether it’s a toilet seat or a toddler seat on the floor. Dump the poop, wipe your kid, flush it down or dump it into the toilet. But you need to make sure that you’re wiping your child while they’re on the toilet and flushing your poop down the toilet.
Now, this is where parents kind of laugh at me and think this might be a little bit wacky, but it works! We’re about six weeks into the process now, and what you want to do is cut an X in the bottom of the diaper, where your child poops; have them stay on the toilet when they’re pooping so that it falls out of the diaper.
Extra little tips:
- Get a potty box, full of potty toys that your child can play with while they’re sitting on the toilet that are only designated as bathroom toys.
- Encourage sitting time on the toilet about 15-30 minutes after every meal, and have your child sit for at least five minutes.
- When they are sitting on the toilet after those meals put some Vaseline around their touch because if they had a dramatic painful poop when they may have been constipated, then they may be fearing that pain. And you can tell them this is magic poop lotion, it’s going to help your poop slide out easier.
- Look into foods and drinks that are going to encourage your child to poop regularly. Things like apple juice, pear juice, apples, pears, watermelon, chia seeds, are all amazing options for helping kids poop.
All of those things are going to help nutritionally and then emotionally, it’s really great to learn through play. I have a video on that right here https://youtu.be/8r_wIPy30bk, teaching your child about potty training and using the toilet through play, and also watching lots of videos, reading lots of books, and having conversations about pooping on the toilet may give you some insight into what your child might be scared of in the first place.
I know that is a ton of information. If you’re still struggling, I want to invite you to set up a free introductory call with me. We can talk about your situation, what your child is going through, what you’ve already tried and how I can help you with my potty training services. Head to https://www.slumberandbloom.com/free-evaluation to set up a free call with me.
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Missy Yandow
Pediatric Sleep Consultant
Potty Training Coach
